The Loss of a great friend

Abby Michelle Dana

5 Years ago On April 22,2004 I lost my childhood friend to a car accident.It hurts to remember how she left us,but I want to share her story..of my life with my best friend.

At the age of 2 I met a baby,who for 18 years was my best friend.Our Mothers have been friends since childhood,and at a early age my mothers best friend lost her father.It seemed though life was hard Jamee found it easier when she was surrounded by her family and friends Years later after two other children(Allison and Ashley) Jamee and her husband Kirk had there youngest ..My Best friend Abby. Abby and I got in more trouble then you could think of,we'd go roller blading down her hill by her house and fall and get stuck in the rain,we played Marco polo in her swimming pool,& we gossiped about all the cute boys we glanced are ways.We both grew up in the same town,though we went to Two different grade schools and Jr. Highs.I went to a catholic grade school and Jr high she went to public school. Two different people who couldn't of known more about each other .Finally high school came we were as close as sister,we fought sure..But we made up,we were two girls who had rough lives,she hadn't known her grandfather and mind had been through a life and death surgery.Through the rough times we remained friends.Then are Jr. Year in High school a nasty rumor about Abby was going around school a girl who disliked me,told Abby I spread the rumor,At first I thought Abby would never believe her.But a year went by,My best friend and sister became just another person in the school hallway.

Finally came the day where she began saying hello to me again.It was our senior year and she was pregnant,a happy mother to be she showed her belly to anyone who would look her way.(She told me,we'd have kids just like are mothers,just a few years apart,(as I am 2 years older then her)She ended up graduating early from high school,I finished out the year and

tried to keep in touch.She was a proud mother,and a proud daughter.She quit her drinking and partying for a few months,but she missed it,we went to a few parties and would drive home,Never to think.Then a month after high school I told her I was moving,told her I was scared.I was moving to Vegas..She said to me "were not sister Heather by blood but that's only because god needed to separate us."I told her Id miss her terribly and I would miss seeing her everyday and something Id miss was watching her raise her little baby boy.Who is spitting image from temper to looks like his mom.

Then the fatal day,A day I'd never forget..April 22,2004. I was frightened by the sound of my telephone ringing,I awoke to answer to see I was to late..As I sat up in my bed,To listen to my voice mail my friend Desitny-said She had something huge to tell me,I thought to myself..Oh this could wait,But a weird feeling came over my body as I sat there thinking,what was going on back at home.As I called her back she told me to prepare my heart for the wost.Abby had been killed in a car accident earlier that morning a block away from her home. I told Destiny..She was crazy,I said Ill prove it Ill call Abby,shes still alive.It took time to sink in that my best friend was no longer here on earth.I called my mother at work crying non-stop,Finally I sobbed out what's going on,she told me the worst had happened,it was the truth,Abby wasn't there anymore..I finished getting ready for class in disbelief that I as 1,700 miles away and my best friend needed me.I didn't get to return home for the funeral(as I was in College)Though I know Abby forgave me for not being there,It still hurt.A month and half later I was able to make my way back home.The last month and half had been a living nightmare,finally the truth hit me,I drove to her home where she grew up.Her son Drake ran up to me as if he knew me,Hugged me and said hi Heather..he hugged me and I cried,I tried to walk away cause I didn't want to scare him,but he just hugged me..(this is him now at the age of 6)

Then Abby's mom Jamee came up to me and hugged me and said everything is going to be OK Heather..and its OK to cry,I told her I loved her,and that I didn't want to make her sadder then she already was,so we walked around.There I found statues of Angels and as I walked inside down to her old bedroom..Empty.Once filled with childhood memories and pictures,Now empty.I told her parents and two sisters they would always be a Big part of my life.As I started to walk a way a gust of wind picked up..I felt as if she was standing next to me..With tears filled in my eyes I looked back at the house she lived in as if it were my own,I recalled the swimming pool,the trampoline,so many late night chats and sleepovers on the back porch..But that was all gone.I then left and found myself on the hill we once played on,but now I just cry about how she could left so fast and so soon.As I left to visit her son Drake.By looking at him it reminded me of what she had said a few months back.."we have to raise our kids together,Just like Our Mothers..So get Busy."

5 years ago in April I lost my Best Friend,My sister and classmate.She excepted me for me.I love her and I miss her more and more every day.

Abby All I want you to know is that you re truly on of a kind I wont ever forget you in my heart you well always stay.Forever my Best Friend,and sister..and Guardian Angel.

Here is a poem I wrote for her back in 3/1/2007

"My Guardian Angel and Best Friend"

I awoke from a deep sleep thought maybe I was dreaming,but I wasn't quite sure.You stood there,as an angel from above.You told me that Id be OK and that I could make it.I was the tough one you said.I started to cry,knowing deep down I had to of been dreaming.As I wiped away my tears you asked me to remember the person I was and to be that person again.I looked up to you and said I couldn't remember who that person was anymore,I was worn out with life I asked you to come back so you could live a life you deserved and I could take your place,because I was ready to give up 2 1/2 years ago when you left us on earth my best Friend and my sister you had been for 18 years when you died in that car accident I was there and along with you my best Friend I died to.When you came to me that night I wanted you to still be alive when I woke up but I knew the truth you told me I'd make it through all the pain and suffering that I had been dealing with the last few years.I said it hurt so much and that i need you so you decided to tell me that no matter what you'd always be there,always have my back always be my best friend.But I cried I knew the truth you were in heaven and i was stuck in hell on earth you told me as much as I thought we could trade places you said I was chosen to still live my life because it wasn't my turn to go.I cried again.You hugged me and said what happened to the best friend I grew up with the one that always made me laugh,I said on April 22,2004 she died in that car accident along side you.Then I saw a tear come down her face,you said I need you to be Strong and just remember what we used to say,well see each other again no matter what.Then before I knew it she was gone again.I woke up and felt like I had to remember who I used to be,and as I stared at her picture I smiled..NO more tears I said Ill see you again..No matter what..

One of the Best Men In my Life..My Grandpa John

My Grandpa John

Like most kids I was my grandpa John's little angel and he always said I never could do anything wrong.

When he got sick 13 1/2 years ago,I felt I didn't know how to treat him I was about 12 years old,and it seemed that none of the doctor's could fix him.When he was sick he couldn't keep from getting pneumonia.So a few years back he got a Tube that went down to his stomach so he could eat,and drink with out getting the Pneumonia so many times..The doctor's said that he would keep getting the Pneumonia and one day just not be be able to make it anymore and he would be gone..
He made it 13 1/2 years,and I believe even to this day he did it to see his 16 grandchildren grow up.A lot of the grandchildren like my sister well remember him sick..But I'll remember the day he made us that tire swing or the days he'd sit in his garage with a can of his favorite Beer.Or be in there tinkering with his favorite Hobby..Building Old Cars.

He would of be 75 this past November 1'st but he didn't make it. October 19,2008 came like any other day tell I got the news..,one minute he was telling me I love you baby..Then 8 hours later I got a call from my dad and Dad told me Grandpa was gone..Myself along with the rest of the family lost a great man,A man who stood up for what he believed in and always stood his ground no matter what life threw at him.I look at that week like a blur standing in the distance because as far as I was concern he was still at home..Though I cant remember much of that week,I remember not being able to say goodbye,to a man I looked up to,a man I call my Hero.

Before Grandpa got married to my grandma he was in the Army,and was stationed in Germany while the Korean War was going on.He is a Veteran :)
My Grandparents were married November 30,1957 . They have 6 children and 16 grandchildren.

They were married 50 years November 30,2007 (Here are pics from there 50th anniversary party)That I'm glad I went home for :)

He is more then A father,a grandpa,a uncle,a son. He was a HERO.. He was my Hero.

Not much changed for me when I came back to Vegas after that week,of tears and questions of why..I kept it in my head that he was just at home,and I went on this way tell I went home this past June.I didn't want the reality to be that he was gone.

When I went to visit my Grandma in June 2009 I noticed his favorite chair was moved,and I asked my grandma why his pictures I sent were off the wall.She said everyone is telling me I have to move on and I have to let the pictures go.She said she saved them and put them in his room and asked me if I wanted to see them,I stood there.I couldn't go back to his room not yet,Because I knew what I would see..his American Flag folded nicely with his medals would be there,he wouldn't be.His bed would be empty and his window would be shut,I just wasn't ready to say goodbye,NOT YET...

This was the last time I would see my Grandpa John Alive, June 2008.

He was one of my favorite people and the best man I ever knew.When I was a kid he would push me on this Huge Tire Swing that he made for me and my other cousins,he was the sweetest man and the best Grandpa that a girl could ask for.It broke our hearts to lose him,but I know that he's not hurting anymore and he can drink and eat all his heart desires.He well never be forgotten and I well always remember the memories and the years we had him here on earth,but I just cant help to go back home,and know that my grandpa wont be joining us for Christmas Dinner or Grandma's Home made Lasagna that I love so much.I just know that there well always be a HUGE part of each one of us that is missing because he isn't here anymore..Love u papa<3>

My LIfe & My Job..

I am 25, some days I feel more like 95. I work at a Cafe and I love cooking. Just last year on mother's day(May 12,2008) got a promotion (thanks to a lot of confidence from a great friend,and a fellow co-worker(LIZ )(shes the blond on my right) I decided that it was time to see what I could do..,Lets just say it hasn't been easy.. I practically gave up my life. So why did I do it? I wanted to see if I could If I was smart enough to put the education that I got from Le Cordon Bleu of Culinary Arts to use.Do I remember a lot from that School.. NOT REALLY.. Lets just say the older I get the farther away information Ive learned just seems to disappear..oops :/

Ive had a lot of ups and downs and I guess that's with a lot of jobs,so I guess I'm doing ok if Ive made it a year, When I hit my year May 12,2009. I emailed Liz and told her how much her confidence in me and knowing that she has my back,that I wouldn't ever try to let her down.Its been 2 months since then and Ive had my share of troubles,but Ive got through them..so Thanks Liz :)

Here I am a Year Later..

So enough of work here is a look back at my past...

I grew up in Kewanee,IL its a small town most people haven't ever heard of,but its home to me.

I was a Only Child tell the age of almost 9.So I spent most of that time Pretty much spoiled Rotten (as my grandma Betty would say)
I was a very outgoing even as a young kid,My dad never had any boys so I soon became his little helper.I was also the first Grandchild of my mom's parents(John and Betty).

I had it pretty easy as a child. I had the best of both worlds, Two Amazing hard working Parents,and a Grandma that baby sat when the parents were at work.

Back in Kewanee we have what you call Hog Days(Labor Day weekend) and we have a carnival & Rides and Cotton Candy and a Parade and a lot of competition,For a long time I was in the Braid Contest,and every year I won..(That's what you get with all the hair I had..)

Here I am in 1988,and I just WON!

I also had a 2 dog's growing up one was Bud he was are Chocolate Lab(my dad's hunting dog)and my dog Rockey (they got him before I was born so mom and I shared him) He was a Half Collie& Saint Bernard. and he was one of the most sweetest dogs ever and extremely protective especially over me mom said. :)

He(Rockey) was 18 when we put him to sleep,he was a GREAT dog.I love him <3

Bud My dads dog he was a great protector,and my dads best hunting dog..He got put to sleep at 16 he had bad hips,and I remember how sad my dad was,he loved that dog..

I went to Visitation School from K-8th grade,and I had a lot of trouble in school..They told me in 3rd grade that they were going to take me back to 2nd because I couldn't comprehend what I read. I could read all day,but give you a book report..was a Little harder.So off I went back to 2nd grade(probably one of the worse experiences in a young girls life ever)After I graduated from Viz, I went on to High school and it was fun and easier and I had more friends then I could of asked for..

April 7,1992 my baby sister Andrea Lee was born. I didn't like her at first I mean give me a break I had my parents for 8 1/2 years and there she was hogging all my attention. Lets just say I got over that pretty fast ..But having a sister so much younger then you is difficult cause what you really want at that age 8 1/2 you want someone to play with not watch her sleep,eat and poop all the time.So I pretty much one day told my dad to put her back where she came from& I'm glad he never did.

(here we are a Year after I moved away)
My sister and I have the best relationship now,shes gonna be a senior this year,and 18. Where the time has gone? I have no idea. Ive missed out on a lot in 6 years here in Las Vegas. There are a lot of things I would change,like the distance.But I wouldn't take back the experience and the people Ive met along the way.
Me and my Little Sister now,How time changes..

Everyday I wonder if I'm doing the right thing,some people ask me do you ever think of moving back home?,and all I can think is,I came out here because there isn't much to do in Kewanee but drink& party.Not that there is anything wrong with that :)

But lately Ive thought more and more about moving home,and at this point that's what seems to be the best for me.Being around family and friends,the Familiar..

Vegas life has never been me,I moved here to help out my uncle and then I went to school then I never left,I said Id give it 5 years and Ive gave it 6 years,So I plan in January to pack up and move closer to the life I miss and closer the ones I left behind.Some might say I'm a failure,that I couldn't make it in the big city,or when things got rough I just couldn't make it.But that's not true,I'm 25 and I've been on my own since I was 19.Ive had rough time and some good times,But I deserve at 25 to be happy.I work so much and these weird/strange hours that I don't have much of a life out here and I deserve to walk back into that town and say I'm back Kewanee watch out!!