The mirror has no answers

I look in the mirror and the girl looking back at me,isn't the girl I remember,I used to look in the mirror and see a smile on my face,and my hazel eyes lit up,now I look in the mirror and I see someone who isn't happy,I see tears in my hazel eyes,and tear drops down my face.I used to question my emotions..but everytime something on tv about military or a Grandpa I lose it all..My heart aches and I cry,I look in mirror everyday for almost 2 years since I lost 2 important people in my life and I wonder how people who lose someone so special just move on and be them again..

I don't know how to look in mirror again and be happy,I cant find the smile I once had.I pray to god and ask him why,though I never figure out the truth behind it all.One day Ill meet him and Ill try to remember all the things I wanted to ask,but for now I look in the mirror and wonder where I went..I wonder why the person staring at me has a sad face,and I wonder why my heart keeps breaking.I try to look past the heartache cause I know there are people out there with more problems then I do..But I want to look in a mirror and remember how it felt to be happy..I want to look in that mirror and know that one day I will see them again,and I really want to look in the mirror and believe that one day Ill be able smile and return to who I was.But Most of all I want to believe that everything is possible,and that girl who once looked in the mirror and loved so very much,well one day be able to look in the mirror and not have tears in her eyes or running down her cheeks,and I want to be the girl who can watch a show about Grandpa's or the military and be able to smile .Most of all I want to be the girl who walks by a soldier and thanks them,and walk by a Grandpa and say I sure do miss you papa with out shedding a tear because Ill know then they are OKAY.<3